Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Right Now - 29/4/09 10:11 AM


Right now, I'm sitting next Larry having a coffee and a breakfast burrito, listening to some new age, wishing I had some clean clothes.  

My shoulder is astoundingly better.  Here's the scoop:  Three nights ago, a chiropractor friend of mine was in the bar and gave me a little adjustment to try to help my shoulder.  It seemed to have maybe helped a little, but my biggest problem was that I couldn't really move still.  The pain with it sitting by itself wasn't bad, but if I tried to raise my elbow or rotate at the shoulder, it would get to a sticking point, as if something was catching it.  Then, bringing it back to its natural position, it would click with spurts of pain, again like a tendon or something was catching and releasing.  So the night before last, I'm walking around looking kinda strange with my arm up, and I went to sit with some other friends, one of whom is a therapeutic "medicinal" masseuse from Sweeden, Anna.  She had had a couple of drinks, but said she wanted to take a look.  I preferred to just let it heal, but she insisted, and came up behind me.  She examined my shoulders with her hands for a bit, and then put two fingers super deep into my armpit, to the point where it was more than uncomfortable.  She applid pressure and said "it's moving now,"  which I couldn't feel anything at all.  10 seconds later, she retreated and told me to lift my arm.  In disbelief, I gave it a shot, and found I had full range of motion.  Un-freakin-real.  I was sure I was out of commission for weeks, but in literally one minute, my arm became my arm again.  Still a bit sore and certainly stiff, but completely usable.  I'm lifting crates again, and even went for a short surf session last night.  If this had happened anywhere else in the world, I would have been out for a whole lot longer, probably would have undergone physical therapy, and maybe even just continued to do damage.  Turns out my muscle under my pectoral muscle was just in the wrong place, and she just put it back where it belongs.  Freakin crazy.  

Anyway, right now I feel good.  I'm a little energized by a cup of coffee, but feel calm and kinda relieved, in spite of not really ever feeling stressed.  Odd the way that works.  I am constantly witnessing an actual difference in my life, finding myself being very easy and even happy and laughing in situations that would have once caused considerable stress, anger, and frustration in the past.  It's pretty cool.  I definitely find myself taking EVERYTHING less seriously.  But at the same time, I do get caught.  I can sense my ego at work, trying his hardest to fit the world around me into my comfort box, and right now I think it fits, so part of my ease is a quiet ego.  It sure makes me even more interested continuing to rob my ego of its strength.  I think a quiet ego is basically the same as a non-existent ego, which means I could have the peace all the time if I could be totally rid of that devil that still lives inside of me.  The calm used to give credit and therefore strength to my ego, but now I think the calm is beginning to take strength away because it reminds me of how good life can be without that nagging son of a bitch.  Or maybe not, maybe my ego is still smart enough to convince me of that so I continue to seek his calm.  I wonder if this is how split personalities start.  So do I.  

1 comment:

  1. Find a beekeeper and try bee sting therapy on your shoulder. The venum of the honey bee has great healing properties. A friend and bee guardian/keeper has done this with his shoulder after arock climbing accident and after 4 Dr.s told him he would never climb again. After they suggested he have operations to modify his shoulder he began to sting himself and within a month or so gained full use of his sholder and is climbing again. Have the beekeeper choose older workers as they will die after they sting your shoulder.

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